I Met the Enemy. It was Me.

I’m conservative with a small ‘c’. I believe in personal responsibility. If something is wrong in my life, it is I who is the cause reaping the effect. It isn’t your fault. It is mine. These days, that makes me a conservative apparently.

When I was interviewing Dr. Andy Cooper recently for my podcast, we talked about cause and effect. It is a big part of the Helios school approach. I understood it as being the cause in your life as opposed to living with your effects. If something is wrong with your relationships, look inside of you to find what it is that you do to cause this effect. You know this is magic and all magicians should be conservative with a small ‘c’ because this is what Know Thyself truly means.

Then I spoke with Steve Tanham of the Silent Eye and he spoke at length about the ego and egoic. That’s the self important part of you that actually causes a lot of those cause and effect issues. The Silent Eye approach is to help you recognise the bits of yourself that make up the whole and become a more centered person. It is based on the idea that to identify stuff in yourself that causes issues and then to change the inner workings of yourself, you can effect change in the world. Again – this too is magic.

True magic isn’t about getting what you want. It is about changing yourself to be the cause of the effect you wish to have. It ain’t easy. Ego is a big bully at times because we all want to be noticed, loved and appreciated. I see this in me but more than that, I see it in my teenage daughter where these things rage as it does with all of us in the child to adult transition.

I think a lot of issues these days are as a result of too many people not taking responsibility for what happens in their lives but rather looking to society to fix it for them. As a conservative, I am also very liberal in my acceptance of others. I try not to judge you for what you try to be and do so long as you understand, it’s not MY fault, it’s not collectively our fault, if you have chosen to be buffeted by effects if your approach to life and your self. You must own it and resolve it yourself.

So, I came across this video of a remarkable speech given by a woman who went through a magical transition even though she may not call it that. Please watch and listen… If more of us thought like this lady, many issues would dissolve away…..

2 thoughts on “I Met the Enemy. It was Me.

  1. No, I hadn’t meant to imply that.. did I do so? I was trying to make the point that many people blame everyone else for their issues and expect others to solve their issues… as per the video in which she meets people on the other side of an argument and realizes she isn’t really listening to them at all but to the narrative in her own head. She was essentially projecting – something we all do a lot I think. I know I do anyway.


  2. I don’t think it is always as simple as accepting responsibility and shouldering the blame. We are responsible for how we face events, their fallout and the actions we take, but we are not responsible for the actions of others. The abused child and the victim of rape, for example, will already feel guilt and shame… they are not responsible for the actions of their attacker, only for how they allow those events to shape their own lives.


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